{"id":1011,"date":"2015-12-16T14:23:48","date_gmt":"2015-12-16T19:23:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/?p=1011"},"modified":"2015-12-16T14:29:35","modified_gmt":"2015-12-16T19:29:35","slug":"explainabondfilmplotbadly","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/2015\/12\/16\/explainabondfilmplotbadly\/","title":{"rendered":"#ExplainA(Bond)FilmPlotBadly"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I have never had so much fun on Twitter. All the Bond movie plots, badly explained:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Maimed rocket scientist invites Englishman to dinner. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/VFEqPJDsf8\">pic.twitter.com\/VFEqPJDsf8<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676512046222020608\">December 14, 2015<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nCat lover books train trip to kindle British-Russian romance. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/zXKNKKZ0NC\">pic.twitter.com\/zXKNKKZ0NC<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676578206594367488\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nMetallurgist fails to exploit patent on laser. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/u0NM7gTpQV\">pic.twitter.com\/u0NM7gTpQV<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676578837136736257\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Shadowy organization causes famous clock to malfunction. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/dPzVj15Fj4\">pic.twitter.com\/dPzVj15Fj4<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676582225761058822\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nFeline&#8217;s whereabouts unknown after volcanic eruption. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/FL0DPp7MR9\">pic.twitter.com\/FL0DPp7MR9<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676583995405021187\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Motorcycle cop provides roadside assistance to honeymooners. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/dJwWp4CGDn\">pic.twitter.com\/dJwWp4CGDn<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676584752464265217\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nScrew it. No one has explained this plot well to begin with. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/H3xscxM0Ax\">pic.twitter.com\/H3xscxM0Ax<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676588854338449410\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Drug dealer changes face, imitates balloon. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/jUkknIAMkx\">pic.twitter.com\/jUkknIAMkx<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676589802368602113\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nPint-sized valet outlives employer, gets into luggage. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/CygFxte022\">pic.twitter.com\/CygFxte022<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676591027214413824\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">British spy devastates Atlantic with dual nuclear blast. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/5eSXlLQGnY\">pic.twitter.com\/5eSXlLQGnY<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676591516681244672\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nU.S. military interrupts orbital botany experiment. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/BCuojIQzV2\">pic.twitter.com\/BCuojIQzV2<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676592602590879744\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Winter Olympic competitors break training to visit Greek monastery. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/1tiEVEa8oX\">pic.twitter.com\/1tiEVEa8oX<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676594148644884482\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>Orphaned entrepreneur makes peace with father&#8217;s killer, attends circus. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/peNDuJTHsQ\">pic.twitter.com\/peNDuJTHsQ<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676596049650257922\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nAging civil servant finds fault with cab service in San Francisco. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/sBIrnILnVW\">pic.twitter.com\/sBIrnILnVW<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676597373477494785\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Cellist&#8217;s worldwide tour ends with Vienna performance. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/r6ronpnhrx\">pic.twitter.com\/r6ronpnhrx<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676598445621305344\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nBest man surprises iguana owner with wedding gift, forgets to comb hair. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/G7GgVSB3GL\">pic.twitter.com\/G7GgVSB3GL<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676601127002103808\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Former business partners disagree over banking transaction. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/0tXqkWltPV\">pic.twitter.com\/0tXqkWltPV<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676604651056316417\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nMedia tycoon invests in high-tech yacht for China voyage. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/JOj3AY4drF\">pic.twitter.com\/JOj3AY4drF<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676606480259358720\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Failure to communicate costs woman her life while once charming spy frowns a lot. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/rGieWEzGdn\">pic.twitter.com\/rGieWEzGdn<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676751477520531457\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nSoldier with daddy issues forsakes heritage to imitate man he despises. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/rRkYBoWUmp\">pic.twitter.com\/rRkYBoWUmp<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676791893162881025\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Card game leads to rope tricks, watered-down urban renewal. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/56GlXJg5Zc\">pic.twitter.com\/56GlXJg5Zc<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676793833607286785\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nVengeful lover takes South American detour to ensure no one goes thirsty. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/whfyTbDvz6\">pic.twitter.com\/whfyTbDvz6<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676849959531110400\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\">\n<p dir=\"ltr\" lang=\"en\">Despite employees&#8217; efforts to save her, woman forgets basic first aid and dies. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/txDwCD3tra\">pic.twitter.com\/txDwCD3tra<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676850301299777538\">December 15, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" lang=\"en\"><p>\nFoster brother returns from grave to practice bird calls. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ExplainAFilmPlotBadly?src=hash\">#ExplainAFilmPlotBadly<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/0LK92aH4UM\">pic.twitter.com\/0LK92aH4UM<\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/JeffreyWesthoff\/status\/676852031064272897\">December 15, 2015<\/a>\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script src=\"\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" async=\"\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have never had so much fun on Twitter. All the Bond movie plots, badly explained: Maimed rocket scientist invites Englishman to dinner. #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly pic.twitter.com\/VFEqPJDsf8 \u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) December 14, 2015 &nbsp; Cat lover books train trip to kindle British-Russian romance. #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly pic.twitter.com\/zXKNKKZ0NC \u2014 Jeffrey Westhoff (@JeffreyWesthoff) December 15, 2015 Metallurgist fails to exploit&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[335,334,377,349],"tags":[570,102,21,390,213,12,20,226,569],"class_list":["post-1011","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bond-films","category-films","category-james-bond","category-personal-ramblings","tag-explainamovieplotbadly","tag-daniel-craig","tag-george-lazenby","tag-james-bond-movies","tag-pierce-brosnan","tag-roger-moore","tag-sean-connery","tag-timothy-dalton","tag-twitter"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5foza-gj","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1011","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1011"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1011\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1025,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1011\/revisions\/1025"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1011"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1011"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.westhoffpws.com\/jeffreywesthoff\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1011"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}